I have never realized how alone I’ve been for so many years until now. When I was homeless and suicidal four years ago, not a single person cared to do or say anything. When the girl I loved called me a terrible person, people turned their backs on me without hesitation. When I was being kicked to the curb by my own family just last month, again, nobody cared.
I am the only person who has ever been there to reassure that my life has to get better than this, but I’m getting tired of feeding myself excuses. I still love her… and maybe it’s why I have finally given into her words. But even if it is the case, she was still right to call me a stupid piece of shit human being. It’s hard to believe that you are not the reason for people to turn their backs on you and/or not have a care in the world for you.
The thing is, I’m not looking for anybody to feel sorry for me or to tell me I’m not a terrible person. Doing that will only just make me feel even worse. All I want is for someone to show that they care for me, that no matter how rotten of a person I am, they will still try to find the good in me (if there is any). I just want to finally feel like I’m not a burden to every single person I encounter.
Flight Facilities | Clair de Lune
The xx | Angels
Tame Impala | Feels Like We Only Go Backwards